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❝ Lesson
( posted on Tuesday, April 21, 2015 @ 7:40 AM )
Just about an hour ago, I had to go through something really horrible. A nightmare, really.
I shouldn't be talking about it much. Or else I'll get emotional. Meh.
But I do wanna talk about something quite important.
I never blamed God for what I went through. Of course I'm sad and hurt. But I knew it was for a reason. Because I know behind all these pain, is just another lesson for me to learn.
And tonight, I learnt about forgiveness, kindness and patience.
Obviously, I've done things I'm not proud of. Especially SAID things I'm not proud of.
I'm just a human. I make mistakes. I could lose my temper any second no matter how hard I try to be patient. I always try to keep things to myself. And because of that, people have ABSOLUTELY no idea what I'm going through at all.
I've been through lots of things which are really heartbreaking. I have trust issues now. REALLY SERIOUS trust issues, seriously. It's just heartbreaking that every time I give my trust to someone, they decide to betray it and yet they always ask for forgiveness and for a second chance. WHY?
Then I realise that I was just the same. I constantly sin and ask for forgiveness from God.
Sometimes, people take our kindness for granted. And we get mad. But most of us take God's mercy for granted. No?
Now THAT'S lesson number 1.
After going through all that, for some reason I decided to go on Twitter and looked through Mufti Menk's tweets. *click on his name for more of his tweets* It helped me calm down and kinda made me realise my mistake.
And these are some of the tweets that I retweeted.
We are often betrayed by the ones we trust, blamed for things we haven't done, deserted by loved ones in times of need. Trust HIM to heal. However deeply you may be hurt by someone, try to forgive. This could just be the act that takes away all your pains on Judgement Day. And then suddenly, I received a DM on Twitter. Someone who was going through the same thing as I did, thanked me for retweeting them & I guess, for the reminder. It made me feel a lot better. I find it kinda warm and comforting for some reason. Mainly because it has been awhile since anyone has said anything comforting to me. YES, we need to be strong at times. We need to be able to pick ourselves up when we fall. But sometimes I need support. Sometimes I can't do it alone. Staying strong for way too long is actually kinda tiring. Not to mention, a little depressing. And then I asked myself, how often do I actually say all these lovely, heartwarming things to people? Not that often, really. And I need to change that. Because I realised there WILL be people going through bad days and sometimes a little compliment would help a lot. So from now on, I'll try to spread love as much as I can. (those who are reading this, YOU should be doing this too haha) And then, this is where kindness & patience comes in. Sometimes, it's just better to be kind. A lot of people think being kind = weak. NO, you people are so wrong. A lot of people think people who don't swear are weak and stuff, but no. You're wrong. Really wrong. It takes A LOT to control your tongue. It's hard. It really is. It's takes a lot to be kind and patient. Seriously. Until one day, I got fed up. I didn't wanna be "weak". Because no one really listens to the "weak" and would always think "oh it's okay, she doesn't mean what she said, she'll forgive me anyway" I decided that people who hurt me, deserves to be treated the same. And that's how I started losing my patience. And I hated it. I could feel myself changing into someone I'd hate. Deep down I knew, this isn't something I should be doing. And because of what I went through JUST NOW, it made me realise a whole lot of things. I realised I've lost myself for awhile. And it's time for me to return. To the way I should be. To be someone I want to be. To be kind and patient. To be understanding. To be someone what Islam has taught me to be. That's what I really want to achieve. Insha'Allah (if God wills) He'll make it easier for me and everyone else to achieve that. Amen. I don't blame that person for treating me that way just now. Yeah, I'm beyond sad and hurt. But it's okay. When we're angry, our temper masks the beauty of our inner selves. Maintain your composure; deal with each situation calmly no matter what. And one more thing I've learnt is to make peace with everything. Everything. Inner peace is so important, guys. It's incredibly important. The past may hurt. But all you need to do is let go. I know it's not easy. No one said it would be easy. If it was easy, the world would be a much more peaceful place. If something/someone is holding you back from obtaining PEACE, just let it go. *frozen let it go song in the background HAHA.* At least, LEARN to let go. It may take some time. But I promise, you'll feel a whole lot better. By HURTING others the way they hurt you, is useless really. When you realise how wrong it is, you'll realise how much pain you've caused someone, really. By hurting someone, it shows who you really are and how mean you are. It only ruins your own reputation and most importantly, your inner peace. Now if you love yourself, you wouldn't want to go through all that. Would you? I had to learn it the hard way. Anyway, there are much more things I want to talk about but I'm a little busy right now. I'll just continue some other time. I hope some of you will benefit from this post, insha'Allah (if God wills). Love, Elina. |
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